Sack of vegetables

Nasrudin snuck into someone's garden and began putting vegetable in his sack. The owner saw him and shouted, "What are you doing in my garden?"

"The wind blew me here," Nasrudin confidently responded.

"Well then," said the other. "Can explain how those vegetables were pulled out from my garden?"

"Oh, that's simple," Nasrudin explained. "I had to grab them to stop myself from being thrown any further by the wind."

"Well," the man continued, "then tell me this--how did the vegetables get in your sack?"

"You know what," Nasrudin said, "I was just standing here and wondering that same thing myself!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Are you asleep?

Nasrudin was lying on his couch with his eyes closed. His brother-in-law went up to him and asked, "Are you asleep?" "Why do you ask?" Nasrudin replied. "I was wondering if you could loan me three hundred dinars," said the other. "Well," answered Nasrudin, "let's go back to you your fist question--'Am I asleep.' The answer is yes, I am--so leave me alone!"