They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.
* * * * * * * * *
The doctor gave me one year to live. So in the heat of the moment, I shot him. And the judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
* * * * * * * * *
What animal has five legs?
A pitbull returning from a playground.
    
    Compiled from the internet