Waiter? I’m sorry, but I cannot eat all this. Would you be so kind and pack it for me? To take away?

But sir, this is a buffet.

Pack it up I said!“

* * * * * * * * * *

A German, an American and a Russian walk into a bar.

The bartender looks at them suspiciously and says, “Is this some kind of a joke?”

* * * * * * * * * *

I’m already doing 60 in a 30 mph zone and still that guy is sticking to me. And now he’s blinding me with these fancy blinking blue lights. The world is full of psychos!

    Compiled from the internet