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20 September, 2016 00:00 00 AM
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Politician in a hole..!

ROBERT CLEMENTS

Sadly, every once in a while we hear about small children falling into borewell holes and we have either the military or other government forces trying to rescue the child. The camera man pans his lens ever so often onto a group of politicians who sit on one side, ready like vultures to spring up at appropriate moment and steal all the glory of the rescue operation. As I watched these white kurta clad netas, I mischievously wondered what would have happened had one of them fallen in the hole.
"There's somebody fallen into the hole?" shouts his PA to the TV station.
"Who?"
"A minister!"   
"Oh! Let him be, we have other events to cover than rescue operations of a minister!"
However on instructions of higher ups Doordarshan is called: "I want you to cover the event!" shrieks Sonia, "I want the nation to see how my ministers react when there is a crisis!" A cameraman is sent to the village of Kurukshetra and walks to the hole where he lowers his sound equipment to where the minister is.
"The minister is weeping! He wants food!" says the TV man
"I have sent down tea and glucose biscuits!"
"Then what is he crying for?"
"He wants tandoori chicken with Hyderabadi biriyani, and he wants the waiter to knock before entering the hole as he might be in the midst of some private activity!"
The camera man inserts a long chord into the hole which has a camera at the other end, there is a roar from inside the hole and the livid face of the minister is flashed on the screen, "He is angry!" says the cameraman.
"He thinks it is a spy cam," says the PA.
"Tell him it's not or he may damage my camera!"
"This is not a secret camera, you are on TV!" shouts the PA into the two way mike and immediately a pleased look comes on the minister's face as he also whispers something, "He is asking for a make up man!"
"Is this going live to the nation?" asks the PA after a few hours.
"No!"
"So who will see it?"
"Only you and I, nobody else is interested! When is the rescue team coming?"
"They said the same thing!"
"What?"
"That they are not interested!"
"So who will rescue the minister?" asks the cameraman.
"I don't know!" says the PA, "and it is getting late and my family are waiting to be taken out for dinner and I have promised them…"
"Tandoori chicken with Hyderabadi biriyani!" smiles the cameraman as he pulls the audio and video wires out of the hole, "come my duty ends now, I'll give you a lift to the main road..!"

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Published by the Editor on behalf of Independent Publications Limited at Media Printers, 446/H, Tejgaon I/A, Dhaka-1215.
Editorial, News & Commercial Offices : Beximco Media Complex, 149-150 Tejgaon I/A, Dhaka-1208, Bangladesh. GPO Box No. 934, Dhaka-1000.

Editor : M. Shamsur Rahman
Published by the Editor on behalf of Independent Publications Limited at Media Printers, 446/H, Tejgaon I/A, Dhaka-1215.
Editorial, News & Commercial Offices : Beximco Media Complex, 149-150 Tejgaon I/A, Dhaka-1208, Bangladesh. GPO Box No. 934, Dhaka-1000.

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