shift in childcare norms
By Limana Solaiman Mridha
When we were young, whenever our mother went out, we were left with the household help who had been working for us for years. As she was there since the time I was born, my mother trusted her with us all the time. In those days, working mothers would leave their children with grandparents or aunts, or hire an ayah (nanny), and thus was the norm.
But these days, even though many people still live in joint families, there has been a shift in childcare and parents are having trouble leaving their little ones at home. One reason behind this is that many grandparents nowadays dont wish to help with the upbringing of their grandkids, or they themselves may still be working. In many cases, the grandparents and other relatives live far away.
And if a child is left behind with the hired help, he or she may risk neglect or some sort of abuse, as it is becoming difficult to get caring and reliable ayahs. All this is proving to be a dilemma for many parents, especially working mothers.
I have to request my mother-in-law everyday to look after my child, even though she stays at home and I work an eight-hour job. This is the case for many of my friends as well. I am not angry at her or anything, because she must have her reasons for refusing, said Mahbuba, a 30-year-old banker.
I want to put my kid in a day care centre, like many parents do these days, but my husband has reservations about such places. So, what am I supposed to do now? Quit my job and become a housewife? Thats not happening, no way! So, I drop my kid off with my mother every day before work and pick her up after. I have been doing this for the last three years and honestly, I am tired. The traffic is horrendous and I am just tired from running around all day, continued Mahbuba, who is trying to convince her spouse to accept the evolving ideas of childcare.
Nilufar, a 28-year-old human resources executive, faced the same problem. But she found an alternative solution.
Have you noticed the rising cost of living in Bangladesh recently? If I quit work and become a full time mother, it will be near to impossible for us to cope with everyday costs, let alone make savings. I live in the same building as my in-laws, but my mother-in-law works in an NGO and has little time to raise my children and I have two. So, I opted for a day care facility for my children as I think it is healthier for them as they will be with other kids their age. I drop my children off at 7:30am and my husband picks them up at 6pm and brings them home. I usually reach home around 7pm. This has been working out great for us. We were apprehensive about putting our children in the care of strangers, but we now look at it as a pre-school, where they get to sleep, eat and bathe, of course. We have to work out a different plan once they actually start school, said Nilufar.
To help working parents cope with their child care situation, many day care facilities have opened in various areas of the capital over the past years. With people growing more and more aware about proper upbringing of their children, these centres are striving to provide the best care that would meet the demands of modern-day parents.
We want our own children to be taken care of in a certain way, and that is how we have developed our institution. We try to meet the standards which we would want for our own child. Our caregivers are trained professionals and teachers, and we also have preschool and many extracurricular activities, such as tuition, singing lessons, piano lessons, cooking, art and many others, Zahira Chowdhury, who runs Little Steps, told The Weekend Independent recently.
Little Steps, located in the capitals Gulshan area, provides day care for children aged 1 to 4 years, from 8:30am to 6pm. Other facilities can be availed by older children as well.
Other popular day care and preschools in the capital include Pixie Land, Rainbow Valley and Le Petit.
In Niketon, this correspondent found Wee Learn, which provides child care services for corporate clients such as Citycell, Grameenphone and the Bangladesh Army. They keep children as young as 6 months to 6 years.
When asked as to why the age limit is six, Farzana Selim of the centre said: Mainly, for discipline reasons. Older children talk and behave in a certain manner, which might not be acceptable for younger age groups. We have faced situations regarding this matter, and thus, we opted to set the age limit.
Another good option in the area is the Shaishab centre, which offers similar services.
Child Cheer in Banasree claims to be an early childhood development centre and they follow the policy, framework and guidelines set by the Ministry of Women and Child Affairs. The credentials of the people running the centre speak for themselves, and they have an in-house doctor and nutritionists to ensure that the little ones receive the best care. They have pre-schooling as well as day care facilities. The centre takes children as young as 6 months to as old as 8 years.
While talking to Farhana Rashid, the principal of the institute, we discovered that Child Cheer also accepts special needs children.
We have handled many special needs children in our centre and have seen them develop abilities, just like any child of their age. It is healthier to keep special needs children with kids their age. It promotes development faster, said Farhana, who has a Masters degree in Education from Dhaka University. Kiddies Day Care in Block B of Banasree is also a good option.
A positive attitude is what a parent looks for in a child caregiver and K M Shahidul Islam of MoM Child Care is very positive, to say the least.
We keep children aged 2 to 10, and we try to accommodate them for longer hours, if the need arises. We understand the necessity of working parents and sometimes, we will keep a child as late as 8pm and with the traffic situation in the city, one cannot expect parents to be on time always. We also provide assistance with homework and we try our level best to create a stimulating and fun-filled atmosphere that appeal to a childs needs and wants, said Shahidul.
This homely day care is located in Uttara Sector 4, which also has the popular centre Twinkle Tots. Other day care centres in the area include Day Care for Angels in Sector 13, and Kidz Leadz in Sector 3.
Dhanmondi and Lalmatia areas have several good and well accommodating child care centres, such as Bambi Land in Block E Lalmatia, Purple Train in Block A Lalmatia, Kids Paradise on Road 15/A Dhanmondi, The Beautiful Minds on Road 5 Dhanmondi, to name a few among many others. Many schools, like Singapore Kinderland in Gulshan, also offer after school day care for their young students.
Corporate houses like Robi, Banglalink, Standard Chartered Bank and others have their own day care facilities for their employees children. Many non-government organisations even run day care centres for children of garments workers, who are mostly women. Meanwhile, Brac Centres day care is quite unique with equal opportunity for all employees, which means any employee is entitled to keep their child at the day care facility as long as space is available, and one pays fees according to their job grade.
Changing norms have given rise to this whole new service industry and working parents are also accepting that change. It is no longer required for a woman to give up her career and dreams to become a mother. Or a single father, for that matter, no longer has to depend on the kindness of relatives to take care of their little ones.
Our society is evolving and accommodating new ideas, keeping your child in day care is no longer frowned upon by the elderly, but rather, the idea is promoted in many households due to the availability of these well equipped pre-school and day care centres. It is more than likely that your child may enjoy the benefits of the company of other children his/her own age and fall into a routine under careful guidance of expert caregivers.
photos: courtesy
