Laughing out loud

A guy goes into a lawyer’s office and asks the lawyer: “Excuse me, how much do you charge?”

The lawyer responds: “I charge £1,000 to answer three questions.”

“Bloody hell – That’s a bit expensive isn’t it?”

“Yes. What’s your third question?”

* * * * * * * * * * *

My roommate told me my clothes look gay.

I was like, don’t be a dick dude; they just came out of the closet.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes.

* * * * * * * * * * *

I couldn’t believe that the highway department called my dad a thief.

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

 Compiled from the internet

Laughing out loud

A guy goes into a lawyers office and asks the lawyer: Excuse me, how much do you charge? The lawyer responds: I charge 1,000 to answer three questions. Bloody hell Thats a bit expensive isnt it? Yes. Whats your third question? * * * * * * * * * * * My roommate told me my clothes look gay. I was like, dont be a dick dude; they just came out of the closet. * * * * * * * * * * * Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, youll be a mile away, and youll have their shoes. * * * * * * * * * * * I couldnt believe that the highway department called my dad a thief. But when I got home, all the signs were there. Compiled from the internet