Make me a match.!

Matchmaker, Matchmaker,
Make me a match
Find me a find,
Catch me a catch
Matchmaker, Matchmaker
Look through your books
and make me a perfect match.
 
And as the strains of Fiddler On The Roof's chorus fades away, I wondered how the local matchmaker was faring what with so many online matrimonial sites flourishing. I found her or rather she found me; she was just outside my door when I stepped out, "You look troubled!" she said quickly.
"Yes," I said, "I've been wanting to see you!"
"I know! I know! I heard fighting last night!"
"You did?" I asked startled.
"Last night wasn't too bad, but it becomes worse!" she said knowingly, "and it's better to start looking around now itself! There's this widow in the next colony, or would you settle for a divorcee? There's also a twenty something girl who wouldn't mind a father figure, though she's a bit of a plain jane if you ask me!"
"Whoa! Whoa!" I shouted, "what you heard last night were cats fighting in my house, here I even got scratched trying to separate them!"
"Oh!" said the matchmaker looking disappointed, "I was going to approach your wife in the evening, now I'll have to go elsewhere for business!"
"So that's how you're getting business! You are finding matches for already married people!" I said crossly.
"We have to survive Bob, so we keep our nose close to the ground and our ears close to windows and doors for signs of marital discord! Last week I saw Mr Jones getting into his car without opening the door for his wife and now I've got her interested in Bill round the corner!"  
"Ye gads!" I whispered, "you're rather clever aren't you!" "What with these online sites flourishing, I could be out of business if I didn't use my ingenuity!" said the matchmaker as she peered at me through her horn rimmed spectacles.  "Tell me who is better!" I said finally getting down to what I wanted to talk about, "you or those matrimonial agencies?"
"We matchmakers of course! Those agencies don't know nothing," said the matchmaker defiantly, "when I introduce a couple to each other, I've done my homework, I've studied both of them thoroughly, till I understand their every characteristic and know they are made for each other!"
"And in a matrimonial site?"
"Who does the matchmaking? The boys and girls themselves! They mention traits about themselves which their partners find out later don't exist!"  "And I guess in your case you guarantee a couple a life time of bliss?"
"Not anymore Bob, not anymore, now I see that the marriage lasts for five years and then like a headhunter I'm at their window with a new offer. Times have changed; we've got to survive. Now about that widow I was talking about, she's quite pretty when she wears black..!"
I fled as I saw the wife looking out of her window.
                                   
    [email protected]

 

 

Make me a match.!

Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make me a match Find me a find, Catch me a catch Matchmaker, Matchmaker Look through your books and make me a perfect match. And as the strains of Fiddler On The Roofs chorus fades away, I wondered how the local matchmaker was faring what with so many online matrimonial sites flourishing. I found her or rather she found me; she was just outside my door when I stepped out, You look troubled! she said quickly. Yes, I said, Ive been wanting to see you! I know! I know! I heard fighting last night! You did? I asked startled. Last night wasnt too bad, but it becomes worse! she said knowingly, and its better to start looking around now itself! Theres this widow in the next colony, or would you settle for a divorcee? Theres also a twenty something girl who wouldnt mind a father figure, though shes a bit of a plain jane if you ask me! Whoa! Whoa! I shouted, what you heard last night were cats fighting in my house, here I even got scratched trying to separate them! Oh! said the matchmaker looking disappointed, I was going to approach your wife in the evening, now Ill have to go elsewhere for business! So thats how youre getting business! You are finding matches for already married people! I said crossly. We have to survive Bob, so we keep our nose close to the ground and our ears close to windows and doors for signs of marital discord! Last week I saw Mr Jones getting into his car without opening the door for his wife and now Ive got her interested in Bill round the corner! Ye gads! I whispered, youre rather clever arent you! What with these online sites flourishing, I could be out of business if I didnt use my ingenuity! said the matchmaker as she peered at me through her horn rimmed spectacles. Tell me who is better! I said finally getting down to what I wanted to talk about, you or those matrimonial agencies? We matchmakers of course! Those agencies dont know nothing, said the matchmaker defiantly, when I introduce a couple to each other, Ive done my homework, Ive studied both of them thoroughly, till I understand their every characteristic and know they are made for each other! And in a matrimonial site? Who does the matchmaking? The boys and girls themselves! They mention traits about themselves which their partners find out later dont exist! And I guess in your case you guarantee a couple a life time of bliss? Not anymore Bob, not anymore, now I see that the marriage lasts for five years and then like a headhunter Im at their window with a new offer. Times have changed; weve got to survive. Now about that widow I was talking about, shes quite pretty when she wears black..! I fled as I saw the wife looking out of her window. [email protected]