Laughing out loud
Wife arrives home late at night from a business trip and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. But she notices four legs instead of two peeking from under the blanket! Seized by a fit of rage, she reaches for the baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket until the screaming stops.
Still in shock, she lurches to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.
Oh welcome home darling, he says, my parents came for a visit, so I let them have our bedroom. I hope you said hello.
* * * * * * * *
One day Jimmy got home early from school and his mom asked, Why are you home so early? He answered, Because I was the only one that answered a question in my class. She said, Wow, my son is a genius. What was the question? Jimmy replied, The question was Who threw the trash can at the principals head?
* * * * * * * *
Assistant: Sir, can I have a day off next week to visit my mother-in-law?
Boss: Certainly not!
Assistant: Thank you so much sir! I knew you would be understanding.
* * * * * * * *
An optimist sees light at the end of a tunnel and thinks its an exit.
A pessimist sees light at the end of a tunnel and assumes it is an onrushing train.
The train conductor sees two stupid guys staggering on train tracks.
* * * * * * * *
We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was Michael.
Compiled from the internet
