Childlike wisdom..!
ROBERT CLEMENTS
As little fellows my brother and I, were caught in a hailstorm. When we reached home he turned and asked me where hail was made.
On our terrace, I replied, and then God throws it down on us..! An uncle of mine who was a teacher heard what I had just said and was furious about my lack of knowledge. That uncle has passed away, but I wish he was here today to see the kind of wisdom children have nowadays:
....The following gems of wisdom were gleaned from test papers and essays from elementary, junior high, high school, and college students.
1. Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
2. Blood flows down one leg and up the other.
3. Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.
4. Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.
5. Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.
6. To prevent milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.
7. The parts of speech are lungs and air.
8. The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.
9. A census taker is a man who goes from house to house increasing the population.
10. Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.
11. The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom.
12. The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.
13. Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.
14. Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners.
15. Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.
16. The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empires in the East and the sun sets in the West.
17. Gravity was invented by Issac Walton. It is chiefly noticeable in the autumn when the apples are falling off the trees.
18. The Magna Carta provided that no man should be hanged twice for the same offence.
19. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.
20. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.
21. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German half Italian and half English. He was very large.
22. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldnt have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth!
Ha, ha ,ha, somewhere up there I hope my dear uncle realises his nephew was as wise as all the rest of them his age..!
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